Patrick's Backgammon Championship

Mr. Krabs had a brilliant idea to bring in more customers on a slow Tuesday.

"We're hosting a backgammon tournament!" he announced. "Winner gets free Krabby Patties for a month!"

Soon the Krusty Krab was packed with competitors. Squidward sat at one table, looking confident. "Finally, a game that requires intelligence and strategy," he said smugly.

Sandy was at another table, studying the board carefully. Mrs. Puff sat nervously across from Larry the Lobster, who was flexing between moves.

"Can I play?" Patrick asked, wandering in.

"Patrick, do you even know how to play backgammon?" SpongeBob asked.

"Is it the one with the checkers?"

"Close enough! Here, I'll show you the rules!"

After a quick explanation, Patrick sat down for his first match against Plankton.

"This will be easy," Plankton sneered. "I'll crush you with my superior intellect!"

But Patrick, not really understanding the rules, just moved his pieces randomly. Somehow, every random move he made was exactly the right move.

"What?! How did you—" Plankton sputtered as Patrick won. "That's impossible!"

Patrick moved on to play Mrs. Puff, who was so nervous she kept accidentally helping Patrick win. Then he beat Larry, who was too busy flexing to concentrate.

In the finals, Patrick faced Squidward, who had beaten everyone with his "sophisticated strategy."

"Prepare to lose, Patrick," Squidward said confidently.

"Okay!" Patrick said cheerfully, rolling the dice.

For twenty minutes, Squidward played perfectly, making calculated moves and blocking Patrick at every turn. But Patrick just kept moving pieces randomly, somehow always landing exactly where he needed to be.

"No, no, NO!" Squidward cried as Patrick's last piece landed home. "You can't win! You don't even know how to play!"

"I won?" Patrick looked surprised. "What do I win?"

"Free Krabby Patties for a month!" Mr. Krabs announced reluctantly.

"Yay! I don't even know what backgammon is, but I'm really good at it!"

Squidward fainted.

The End.